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Because Of You

by

Kelly Clarkson



Songfacts®:  You can leave comments about the song at the bottom of the page.

Clarkson wrote this about her parents' divorce when she was 6 years old. The song might be aimed at her mom. When the divorce happened, her mom was always busy and little Kelly had to make sandwiches for herself to eat. (thanks, Steph - Hickville, MO)
In the song, Clarkson sings about trying not to make the same mistakes her parents did, and how because of the divorce, she is scared to fall in love, in fear of going through the same pain her parents did.
On her Breakaway DVD, Clarkson explains that she started writing this long before she won American Idol. Kelly was 16 when she was with friends one night and they were talking about the influence that older people/peers have on you and started writing it. She sent a demo tape of the song to producers David Hodges and Ben Moody (formerly of Evanescence), who liked the song and worked on it with her. (thanks, Carolina - Kindersley, Canada)
Clarkson told Entertainment Weekly why she'd like to be remembered for this song in a 2011 interview: "I think because I worked so damn hard to get it on an album and just everyone was against it. There was some blood, sweat and tears going on there. I think I'm most proud of that song—just getting it on an album because no one liked it until it hit # 1 worldwide and everybody was on board."
Clarkson told the UK newspaper The Guardian: "You may as well grab a knife. That song really is the most depressing one I've ever written. I tried to get it on Thankful, and was laughed at and told I wasn't a good writer. So then I tried to get it on Breakaway – and the label saw the results, people responding to it, and allowed it to become a single. Then took credit for its success, of course."
Clarkson revealed that she burst into tears after playing this song for the first time to Sony record executive Clive Davis. "I cried because he hated it and told me verbatim that I was a 'sh--ty writer who should be grateful for the gifts that he bestows upon me,'" she said. "He continued on about how the song didn't rhyme and how I should just shut up and sing. This was devastating coming from a man who I, as a young girl, considered a musical hero and was so honored to work with."
Kelly Clarkson
Kelly Clarkson Artistfacts
More Kelly Clarkson songs
More songs about marital problems or divorce
More songs about a mother or father

Comments (54):

Well if you look at the lyrics "
I watched you die
I heard you cry every night in your sleep
I was so young
You should have known better than to lean on me
You never thought of anyone else
You just saw your pain
And now I cry in the middle of the night
For the same damn thing"

It seems to talk about a person killing themselves because she leaves them, i don't have proof but that's my thoughts
- wyatt, dfgdg, Afghanistan
If you listen closely the song is blantanly about child abuse.
- Sunshine, Oklahoma City, OK
Powerful, strong messages in this song.
- Valerie, Eureka, CA
This is a very emotional song no matter why it was written. To me, it reminds me of me being married at 15 yrs old and going through a lot of harmful domestic abuse. I had no one to turn to because back then there were no programs for battered wives and my parents believed in the old saying that " You made your bed. Now lay in it", and refused to help in any way. Back then in the early 60's (61-65) men had all the rights and women had almost none in a marriage. It was even legal back then for husbands to rape their wives and the wife could do nothing about it. No laws protected them and neither did most families. Linda
- LINDA, Debary, FL
I have made a video with this song and use it as part of a class I teach to high conflict divorced parents. It immediately catches their attention to the harmful damage that separated parents do when they place their children in the middle of conflicts and lean on them for adult emotional support. Very strong lyrics and a great message to parents who choose to divorce. Grow up and take care of your children.
- Sheri Keller, Topeka, KS
I had an alcoholic mother who suffered from severe delusions. This song expresses what I felt growing up and even now. Every single word rings true and hits me like a ton of bricks. Often it's hard for me to cry, but everytime I put on this song it helps me to remember and I can cry again. I can't praise Kelly enough for having the balls to release such a heartfelt song. It's such a help to me!
- b, groningen, Netherlands
The lyricks, if you read them make it sound like the girl was raped. And as awefull as that may be it is the impression I get when I hear it.
- Martha, New York, NY
i once had to bake my own birthday cake because my parents were fighting on the day of my 10th birthday party. i cried for hours. its so true, parents only see their pain.
- elizabeth, helston, United Kingdom
i love this song so much. it is related to my life in so many ways, i have only recently discovered it and i wish i had heard of it before, its given me strength to believe that im not alone.
my parents are still together but they have told me that they are only still living together to keep my life as normal as possible and when i leave home my dad is moving out. i wish they would just seperate now so i dont have to endure the hatred any longer.
"i was so young you should have known not to lean on me". how i feel every day.
- elizabeth, helston, United Kingdom
this song haz touched me behond words. ive not really felt wat kelly felt when she wrote this song because my parents are still together and happy. but i can relate to how she felt. i love this song. thank you kelly. "my heart cant possibly break when it wasent whole to start with"
- Julie, Pittsburgh, PA
OMGEE. I had to pick a song for school that you really liked and was to your life. I picked this song. I have sung this song to myself and cried over it too many times. This song goes to my heart. I want to thank Kelly for writing this and I know if she got through life okay and got her dream she chased for, I know I can do it too. I love you Kelly! If you agree with me please comment me back. Im Savannah.(:
- Savannah M., Dallas, TX
My dad left a few days ago like moved out and stuff....i really like this song because it shows im not alone....i listen to it every morning before school because if she can face the day then so can i....thank you so much for writting this song. you are such a talented singer!
- Kayleigh Raine, Beacon, NY
Great song! Sorry if i'm wrong, but i'm pretty sure it's about a family break up/divorce when she was a kid. "I cannot cry because I know that's weakness in your eyes" suggests her parents see her being upset as a weakness. "You never thought of anyone else. You just saw your pain" suggests they couldn't see how much she was hurting... but the best line is "My heart can't possibly break when it wasn't even whole to start with!" Bless her!
- Nat, derby, England
Kelly's voice on this song is rich, emotional, and sincere. Love her attitude!
- Theresa, Murfreesboro, TN
Ok, so I'm still a child and I haven't been abused like Kelly describes in this song. But I feel so sorry for her! I think it's awful that parents think only about themselves when they are going through a divorce ( I understand this doesn't apply to all divorces) The kids suffer too.
- Meg, Australia, Australia
Whether Kelly had to fix her own food because her mother was busy or her father abused her, this song makes sense to struggling marriages in America and is an instant number one!
- Landon, Winchester, OH
This song reminds me of a girl I used to live with. She never knew her father and her mother had a string of loser boyfriends who used to beat her up. My friend basically acted as an emotional crutch for her mother from her very earliest memory.

Her mother's bad life decisions and her constant use of her daughter for comfort and emotional assistance created a daughter who was so scared of getting hurt the way her mother did that now, at the age of 30, the daughter has all but lost the ability to fall in love and really feel things.
- Sally, Sydney, Australia
Everyone will make of what they want. I believe Kelly sang it about her mother.

For me - it is a song that I would sing to my abusive step-father.

It is the line - 'I was so young, you should have known better than to lean on me.'

'I find it hard to trust not only me, but everyone around me' (to me I have lost my trust in men because of what my step-father did to me)

'My heart can't possibly break as it wasn't whole to start with' (for me this is my own guilt and self-blame as for many yrs I thought I caused the abuse even though I was only a child)

'I now cry in the middle of the night' (at nightime although I'm an adult - this is a huge trigger for me and I have reoccuring nightmares nearly nightly where I'm a child and my step-father is coming into my room to abuse me)
- Hurt, West Yorkshire, England
Depressing song, but Kelly's voice is wonderful!
- Meredith, Wauwatosa, WI
NONONO! It's all about Kelly's dad, who abused her shen she was younger! trust me, I think I know...I know her very well.
- Heather, Toronto, Canada
I love this song sooooo much.I think that's the best song of all of Kelly's songs.I really feel like punching anyone who says that song sucks.It's wonderful although I've never been through what she's been through but sometimes when my parents argue I feel almost the same way.Kelly and her song's pretty,Your just marvolous Kelly seriously
- Elizebeth, coral springs, FL
NO YOU'RE ALL WRONG! When Kelly was young, her father abused her. She is singing about him, Trust me, I met her two years ago, and asked her.
This sond is even deeper than you think...
- Heather, Toronto, Canada
This song is very powerful to me cause I dedicated it to my mother who died when I was 8 she always needed comfort and looked in the wrong places
- karie, jacksonville, FL
This song is so whiny, No offense to Kelly, but sometimes sh*t doesn't work out between parents, it didn't for alot of peoples parents. you don't hear me whining about it on the radio. grow some balls kelly.
- Emily, Hedgesville, WV
I really feel that this song is not geared to the parent that left, but perhaps the parent that stayed. The verse, "I was so young you should have known better than to lean on me," gives reference to someone that was around. This song is so true in every aspect.
- Brittany, Ocean City, MD
Man I love this song. B ut then again I love Kelly Clarkson!
- DJ, Winchester, VA
All you people who dis this song clearly haven't been through sommething that made you feel this way, to some people, it completely expresses how they feel about something. Your insensitivity disgusts me...
- Tina, Monterey, CA
All you people who dis this song CLEARLY have never had anything CLOSE to what inspired kelly to write this song. Consider how other people might feel about music that totally expresses how they feel before saying such rude things about peoples feelings.:-(
- Tina, Monterey, CA
This is such a cute song, and I love it beyond description. I <3 you Kelly
- Lilly, NSW, United States
I really enjoy this song. This is actually one of my favorites by her. I can relate to how she feels. I know what it is like to have your mom lean on you for comfort and your dad never being around. I think that a lot of teens and even adults can relate to the way that she feels.
- Nikki, Wooster, OH
I love this song I think its sad about her parents getting a divorce but I can understand that!!! I feel bad about her situation!!!
- Sandee, Indiana, IN
Kelly has blonde hair in the video... It suits her much better than her original brown hair.
- Merm, New York, NY
Actually the song is about Abuse. Emotional, abuse. Scarred from not having a childhood and being torn between parents. Having a mother always lean on her, being afraid, left with so many scars. A reminder to parents, very sad. Jennifer, Toronto
- Jennifer, Toronto, Canada
I can't stand this song. It sounds like someone is complaining too much and can't handle a little humility.
- Ricky, Los Angeles, CA
I think so many people can relate to this song because so many kids have had to deal with divorce. The song i so right because it shows just how hard divorce can be on kids.
- Caitlin, Upper Township, NJ
I love this song. At the moment im doing a report on is for reading class and i was looking for confirmation on what it is about exactly. My father is an alcoholic and i can relate to every line in this song. It became my favorite because i love listening to songs i can relate to. When i was going through rough times with my dad i heard this song and it made me feel like there are other people who have gone through the same thing. thanks kelly!
- Victoria, somewhere, IL
When I first heard this song, I thought it was her talking about a lover and it killed me because i knew she was too young to have experienced such love and heartache. I expressed this to my boyfreind and he said she doesn't write her own songs anyway. Then when I read that it was about her childhood, it made so much sense and it made me love this chick so much more. She is so real and it bothers me when people think of her as just an A.I. contestant. She would have made it big on her own even if it wasn't for A.I. She is real, full of heart ans spirit and so special. Rock on girlfriend. I love this song and it makes me cry, that says a lot!!!
- anna, philly, PA
This is one of my favorite songs and I like a lot of people relate to it because I saw my parents have trouble in their marriage due to drinking and other things. The parts in song where Kelly sings about being scared and not taking risks because she didn't want to get hurt the way her parents did is what made like this song because I have felt that way. I sometimes don't take risks or aviod doing things. I think Kelly wrote this from her heart and it shows that people's actions do have effects on their children.
- Diane, Albuquerque, NM
I definitely can relate to it becuase my parents went through a divorce almost 6 years ago. When I saw the music video, I had to grab a tissue because it reminded me of when I went through that.
- Sarah, Chapin, IA
I really love Kelly Clarkson's songs!! I always feel i can relate to the songs even though there is no reason for it.
Alana, N.Z
- Alana, Auckland, New Zealand
CRAP!!! The song stinks, the video's lousy, and Kelly Clarkson just keeps getting shoved down everyone's throat! Kelly...ENOUGH ALREADY! It wasn't so bad when she was just on American Idol, and then a short time after we heard that "Miss Independent" song once or twice a week on the radio. Now you can't turn around without hearing her at least 3 times a day. In fact, at my work (where I am right now as I'm writing this, lol) we listen to the local top 40 station, and I actually counted that Clarkson was played about 5 times in 8 hours! If that's not over-exposure I don't know what is!
- Reese, Calgary, Canada
at 1st i didn't really get the song, i thought that it was about her boyfriend or something, but the video made it clear to me, and it almost made me cry.
- sharon, auckland
I love this song
i listen to it all the time
my parents are divorced and i memorized every word to the song!!
u rock kelly
- Bailey, Arroyo Grande, CA
This is a good song. I understand the way she feels, even though I haven't gone throught it. I feel for her. I made me think about people I care for and don't care for, made me relize my reasonings.
- Ashley, North Lima, OH
kelly has a tattoo of a cross of her wrist....so maybe people want that covered up?...beautiful song the film clip almost made me cry lol
- jamie, sydney, Australia
I luv kelly clarkson! she is absolutely stunning and the lyrics to this song although anyone can put it in their own way, are about her parents divorce and THUMBS UP KELLY! another touching song for kids who are going through the same kind of thing to listen to and cope with what's happening. an awesome song from an awesome chick! if my parents were to divorce i would definately listen to this song and i think it would help me through the bad times. i have just one question though... why does kelly always cover her wrists?
- Stacy, Sunbury, Australia
this song is great. when you're listening to it you really feel like your part of it. and if you havent been through it (divorce) before you can just listen to this song because se puts it into a way were you can nearly be part of what happened.... she's great
- amanda, Dub, Ireland
This song is sad and I feel apart of it because my parents went thourgh it too, my mom twice. I have memorize every word just by listing to it.
- Jennifer, Las Vagas, NV
My friend from Burleson (Kelly's hometown) told me this song is about a manager at a movie theatre that she had a crush on. I laughed, but apparently so did this girls sister, so he must have been a stud or something.
- Micah, College Station, TX
this song is so sad, o love it
- Letty, tERRE hAUTE, IN
I'm not really in to Kelly Clarkson's type of music, but I suppose I can make a few exceptions. This song is well-done and deserves a thumbs up. I sort of wonder the same thing as Martin. The video is touching and makes me heavy-hearted.
- Kimberly, Greeley, CO
hey i love this song i feel very connected to it
- isa, launceston, Australia
is this song not about when she was younger and one of her parents were bastards and now she feels for it ?
- martin owens, belfast, Ireland
This song is about reasons. Like everything happens for a reason. Life has reasons, and that is why things happen.
- Elizabeth, Alexandria, VA
We're sorry for the inconvenience. Comments are closed for update.
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