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When Blue October frontman Justin Furstenfeld was 28, he started getting his life back together and making amends to the people he hurt as a result of his drug addiction. His mother is featured in the video, which is an honest portrayal of what he put her through.
Justin Furstenfeld's vocals on this song are compelling in that his voice is so direct, so ready for you to know that yes, he is not infallible, and he can admit it. He wrote this song, he says, as a sort of harsh reality check; a peek into how a man can be damagingly selfish in a relationship, and then look in a mirror and admit his mistakes while coming to terms with his own behavior. "It's like, let me just kind of clue you in on what it feels like in my own brain," he offers on his MySpace site. (thanks, JM - Christmas Island, AL)
In a promotional video, Furstenfeld said of this song: "When you're in a low place, you don't really think about other people, and it's basically an apology to the people you've hurt in the past and giving them advice that maybe you're not the best person to be hanging out with. It's an apology to people I've hurt in the past, and asking for forgiveness. Some of the issues I was going through."
In the album version of this song, it starts with an answering machine message where the singer's mother is asking if he is OK. Also, the music video shows videos of his mother taking care of him by doing everything from helping him when he is drunk to taking pictures of him and a girlfriend, and the video ends with him visiting a grave. This indicates that the song could be about all his mother did for him and what he could have done for her. (thanks, Poke - Happyville, AZ)
asked Furstenfeld if his mother minded being immortalized on the answering machine message. The singer replied: "That had to be done. I was at a point when I was recording that it was the worst of my worst. She hadn't heard from me in quite a while and I got that message and I realized what I was doing to my family. I realized the selfishness in addiction; I hadn't talked to my mom in months. She was calling and that's the exact message, and that's when it clicked in my mind: It's not just me anymore. These people love you; they raised you."
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