Friend Is A Four Letter Word
by Cake

Album: Fashion Nugget (1996)
Play Video

Songfacts®:

  • This song is about a girl who breaks up with a guys by telling him they should be "Friends." This is not what he wants to hear, and to his ears, and the resulting heartbreak makes him think of the word "Friend" as dirty and cruel - similar to many vulgar 4-letter words in the English language. >>
    Suggestion credit:
    Joe - Chicago, IL
  • The lyrics are a play on words, the four letter word they refer to is "iend," and is the only part of the word that the singer hears, which sounds like "end." >>
    Suggestion credit:
    Tim - Roanoke, VA

Comments: 11

  • AnonymousI always took the lyric literally with the “ i end” (the relationship)
  • Malu Rodriguez from Gtto me 4 letter word was hate
  • Kay Otter from Barstow, CaI always thought it was also a vulgar word. Like it my head it was that because around here when we say "a four letter word", it means someone said s--t, c--t, f--k, crap, any varied 4 letter curse word. Kind of a context clue thing. Not sure that is just my area or an actual thing, thing... So I just thought I would chip in. "Friend? F--k." Is how it kind of went down in my head. lol
  • Texacan from Ft WorthI always thought the four letter they were referring to was "over", because "end is the only part of the word that I heard call me morbid or absurd..."
  • Lew from Scottsdale Friend as a 4 letter word is “over”. I thought about that for months.
  • Emiliano from ArgentinaThe four letter word is F--K.
  • Sander from BeAgreed with Tom. If she tells him she wants to be friends, it feels like an insult, it means she wants to end the relationship, and merely tries to make it sound less harsh.
  • Hollym from TxWhat I see hear actually makes alot of sense. My ex said it was the word "f--k" but he was dull and dense. "iend" makes alot more sense. The "end" part resonated, but now I get it. "Call me morbid or absurd"... "iend" isn't "end" it's "i end" and in, I end.

    The thought of her wanting to just be friends shattered his world. There's hope there, too because now he can build anew. ?? What do y'all think?
  • Chris from Sky Valley, GaTom, Tim kinda has a point. While Joe is right as far as the greater sense is concerned, this is Cake, and the double entendre between the seriousness of a break up and the absurd "I only heard you say 'iend'" is something they would totally do. That's what's awesome about Cake and particularly this song: it's neither just a comedy nor a tragedy but both at once. If you pay attention to the line "to me, coming from you, friend is a four letter word. / (i)end is the only part of the word that I heard" is purposefully vague. Leaving the option that the song can be about a sad break up or a absurd miscommunication. The line "call me morbid or absurd" references the duality: "morbid" referring to the tragedy of a break up and "absurd" referring to the "iend" confusion.
  • Jackie from Blacksburg, VaI would not go so far as there will be no relationship. It's about the line heard in life "Let's just be friends." What she says / means is one thing, but he hears is just "end" as it usually means the end. I have had relationships that do remain friends though, so it's not always.
  • Tom from Florence, ScTim, you have no clue. "iend"? Really?

    What they're saying is that the word "friend" is a four letter word. In other words, it's a dirty word. The wordplay is then that "end" (the last three letters of the word) is the only part of the word "friend" that he hears when she utters the word. The relationship is over, it is at its END ... there will be no friendship.
see more comments

Editor's Picks

Meshell Ndegeocello

Meshell NdegeocelloSongwriter Interviews

Meshell Ndegeocello talks about recording "Wild Night" with John Mellencamp, and explains why she shied away from the spotlight.

Rock Stars of Horror

Rock Stars of HorrorMusic Quiz

Rock Stars - especially those in the metal realm - are often enlisted for horror movies. See if you know can match the rocker to the role.

Yoko Ono

Yoko OnoSongwriter Interviews

At 80 years old, Yoko has 10 #1 Dance hits. She discusses some of her songs and explains what inspired John Lennon's return to music in 1980.

Eagles Lyrics Quiz

Eagles Lyrics QuizMusic Quiz

Lots of life lessons in these Eagles lyrics - can you match them to the correct song?

Phil Hurtt ("I'll Be Around")

Phil Hurtt ("I'll Be Around")Songwriter Interviews

Phil was a songwriter, producer and voice behind many Philadelphia soul classics. When disco hit, he got an interesting project: The Village People.

Rupert Hine

Rupert HineSongwriter Interviews

Producer Rupert Hine talks about crafting hits for Tina Turner, Howard Jones and The Fixx.