Songfacts®:

• Along with the B-side, "I Wanna Be A Winner" was a one-off novelty single by a group that didn't actually exist. Brown Sauce consisted of three British DJs: Noel Edmonds, Keith Chegwin and Maggie Philbin. The song was produced by B.A. Robertson, who co-wrote it with Edmonds. It was released in 1981 in both the UK and Germany.
• "I Wanna Be A Winner" contains a number of cultural references which future listeners may not find easy to identify. The Diana alluded to is the tragic Diana, Princess of Wales who married Prince Charles the same year (and who also features in the rewritten "Candle In The Wind"); Barbara Woodhouse (1910-88) was a famous dog trainer; and Hurricane Higgins was a mercurial snooker player who took to vinyl himself the following year with "One-Four-Seven" after winning his second world title.
  
  Chegwin singing the line, "I've no desire to marry Diana" probably came as a relief to Philbin because she married him the following year, although they divorced in 1993. >>

  Suggestion credit:
  Alexander Baron - London, England, for above 2