Noah Kahan wrote “Porch Light” from his mother’s perspective as she watches her son being pulled into the abyss of fame. And not just any fame. The kind that fills stadiums and sends billions streaming one’s music. Co-written with The National’s Aaron Dessner, “Porch Light” addresses both a mother’s anxiety about her son’s well-being. But it also documents Kahan’s emotional struggles as he navigates a dizzying level of stardom.
It appears on the Vermont singer’s latest album, The Great Divide, and was produced by Kahan, Dessner, and Gabe Simon.
Dividing Family
Kahan’s mother worries about her son. But it’s no use asking how he’s been, as all his movements are now bits of content on the internet.
I would ask you how you’ve been, it’s all over the internet,
But, hey, I mean, you knew that after all.
If you’re looking for an autopsy or a half-assed half-apology,
Then I think you picked the wrong time to make this call.
Losing himself inside the success, Kahan told Zane Lowe, “I always worried that my mom felt or my family felt like I wasn’t myself anymore and that I was just some ghoul that would come in to extrapolate further success or further emotion for my own gain.”
I hope you tell me that you’re winding down,
That you lost the taste to face the crowd.
Meanwhile, his mother waits for him to arrive home. But she’s heartbroken when she wakes up and sees the light still on. He hasn’t returned home.
Poison spreading to my lungs,
I ain’t holding breath, ain’t holding any faith at all.
And I’ll pray for you, be in pain for you,
I’ll leave the porch light on.
Heartbroken, each morning when it’s me that turns it off.
Mental Health Struggles
Dessner wrote on Instagram: “Having had my fair share of mental health struggles and tough times (alongside a lot of support from family and friends), I could relate to every word. It felt fated that this would be the first of many songs we would make together over the last year.”
You’re a ghost.
Photo by Debbie Hickey/Getty Images