In this song, Aaron Lewis sings about a girl who left a long time ago. He cant get over her and he feels ashamed of himself.
Suggestion credit: Brad - Geneva, NY
In the video, the woman being sung to by Staind lead singer Aaron Lewis is actually his wife, Vanessa, whom he married in 1998. Vanessa liked to use her digital camera to record portions of every Staind concert, getting shots of both the band and the crowd. The band would sometimes watch the footage after the show.
The video was directed by Staind mentor and lead singer of Limp Bizkit, Fred Durst.
In 2001, NBC used this in promos for its show UC: Undercover.
A live version of this song appears at the end of Break The Cycle on some releases.
Bob from KansasI have a completely different take on this song. It sounds like the end of an abusive relationship. Particularly, near the end he speaks of not being able to blame his father. Abusive relationships are somewhat "hereditary". Also, in the beginning, when he speaks of "since I first saw you" and "since I could call you", it seems he's been banished from this woman for abuse. Throughout this apologetic theme, he is in pain because a potentially beautiful relationship is over because of his abusive tendencies.
Kent from Greensburg, PaThis song has one of the best music videos ever made.
Chris from Scottsdale, AzThank you Sean in South Africa. I'm somewhere in between where you've been but appreciate the foresight. Thanks man.
Beck from London, United KingdomNot about drugs imo. Love yes. He had obviously been "addicted" to a special woman. I think we can all relate in a way. This would have been a good song to play when the American medical drama "House" was on.
Andrew from Patten, MeI was at the bangor waterfront in Maine this past may 18th. and when this song came on i got tears in my eyes and danced with my fiance to this song. if it wasnt for her i dont know what id do with myself. I love you Kenzie!!!! <3 and Staind put on the best show i have ever seen in my life, im sure that im not the only one to say that i hope they come back to maine for another tour.
Sean from Cape Town, South AfricaI am 27 y/o male from Cape Town SA, been a 'Junkie' for over 11 years now - mainly Heroin and Crack and Crystal Meth, all by means of introvenus intake... I've spent a few months clean here and there, even spent a years and half in the British Army but was medically discharged after contracting a vicous parasitic infestation in a jungle training exercise... anyway the point I'm trying to get to is, I've spent as many years equally dying of a broken heart I recieved from a woman who's more than the love of my life, she is my life, we've been through hell together and I've got the postcards to prove it !! We've overcome, at times together, other times individually, 'youth', 'infedility', 'many forms of 'addiction' to many substances', 'our absolute inability to be with or without eachother', 'the birth of our healthy daughter who's now in foster care', 'over 11 Rehabilitation Centres around the African Continent'... etc. Mainly we have overcome 'ourselves', realizing we were our own worste enemy's - only to find the deepest form of love and commitment, understanding, compassion, patience, tenderness and loylty in eachother, the very things we initially were seeking from one another without being conciously aware of any sort of 'bigger picture', totally niave or perhaps 'blissfully ignorant' to the price our 'souls' agreed on our behalf to pay - unfortunately neither of our 'physical' body's or minds were informed of this unbreakable but extremely necessary 'pact' we were just entered into, for life I believe - though I'm not unwilling to consider that I'm completely full of B - S&^T ha ha.... Everyone who posted on this thread is right and wrong, but who really cares ?!? I feel I need to quote Steve,: "This song is about the lament of someone who just keeps doing it to themselves even though they know better. Drugs are a part of it, but if you've ever known anyone like this, even when they're not on drugs, they just keep doing it to themselves." If this song speaks to you, to something inside you, stirs a primal instinctive reaction from you on any physical level - then enjoy it, appreciate it, feel it... because to have had to live life and to know the 'shame', 'humiliation', 'regrets', 'self-awareness', 'animalistic insanity' required to conceptualise and internalise, psycho-analyse your every understanding of your human nature by utilising a tremendously accute 'perceptiveness' I believe is extremely rare if not extinct in our 'modern civilized society' all for the sake manifesting this 'living, breathing and extremely honest form of lyrical poetry which seems to have influenced, inspired and motivated an enormous number of kindred spirits who find themselves relating to something they may never even have considered to be a part of 'their' version of Reality. I apologise if I've been slightly long winded in my comment, unfortunately I am unable to stop myself from expressing something I've needed to coherently say for the last 10 years: This song is Aaron's gift to the world, his duty to channel so many of our latent or dormant fears and our pain, so to end off, I'd like to atleast say :"Thank you for expressing authentically what I've been incapable of accurately describing for myself, and the woman who is my reason for breathing, from us both, we Salute you brother.... !!
Joel from Richland Springs, ScHoly effing crap! This song speaks volumes for me. True story, I ended up in a psychiatric hospital due to addiction/depression. I don't really listen to much hard rock but g-d damn this is a good effing song.
Jillian from The Bay Area, Ca, CaAlso he says it's been a while since I can say that I WASN'T Addicted.... Obviously drugs and the only drug I have seen do that to anyone was Heroin. It got a hold of me for a min. Here is a eye opener...So now, little man, you've grown tired of grass LSD, goofballs, cocaine and hash, and someone, pretending to be a true friend, said, "I'll introduce you to Miss Heroin." Well honey, before you start fooling with me, just let me inform you of how it will be. For I will seduce you and make you my slave, I've sent men much stronger than you to their graves. You think you could never become a disgrace, and end up addicted to Poppy seed waste. So you'll start inhaling me one afternoon, you'll take me into your arms very soon. And once I've entered deep down in your veins, The craving will nearly drive you insane. You'll swindle your mother and just for a buck. You'll turn into something vile and corrupt. You'll mug and you'll steal for my narcotic charm, and feel contentment when I'm in your arms. The day, when you realize the monster you've grown, you'll solemnly swear to leave me alone. If you think you've got that mystical knack, then sweetie, just try getting me off your back. The vomit, the cramps, your gut tied in knots. The jangling nerves screaming for one more shot. The hot chills and cold sweats, withdrawal pains, can only be saved by my little white grains. There's no other way, and there's no need to look, for deep down inside you know you are hooked. You'll desperately run to the pushers and then, you'll welcome me back to your arms once again. And you will return just as I foretold! I know that you'll give me your body and soul. You'll give up your morals, your conscience, your heart. And you will be mine until, "Death Do Us Part"
Chezchez from New York, NyLove this song. So deep and real gives you chills. Great Band. Love you. Chezchez, Bronx, NY
James Wilson from Trenton, NjI didn't care for this song at first but now it is one of my favorites. The line about bieng addicted speaks volumes. I'm dependent on benzodiazapenes (not sure if that is the exact spelling but its close enough for now). I think its interesting how the edited version still does not get enough radio play. The version I have is edited but I have the lyrics so that's okay. The part about his dad doing the best he could hits close to home. By the way I was taking vicodin (hydrocodone, 500/7 mgs) for my knees and I had to get weened off of those. The benzos were for that plus I have been diagnosed with panic disorder by a psyschiatrist. Thanks for listening or rather reading. Take care, James.
Gus from Fort Smith, ArSelf realization is very sobering. It took losing the love of my life to realize that I was indeed and alcoholic.
Jen from Sterling Heights, MiEvery single person will have a different point of view on this song....it relates to a lot of people. This song, reminds me, from personal experience....(it's about drugs...alcohol in my case)...He is singing about the drug, but at the same time, to the person he disappointed and loved, ...he realizes he had a problem, faced it...and cannot blame it on anybody else but himself....
Robert from Los Angeles, Caits about a lot of things. i've f@#$%d things up in my life too, so i can realte
Hugh from Princeton, NjLike Greg House stated in an above posting the song is about a lot of things. Don't go by what somebody else has stated. That is their opinion and they are entitled to it. Sorry for any spelling errors my Vicodin and Zoloft have begun kicking in. Thanks for listening or in this case reading.
Joann from Portsmouth, VaThis song so reminds me of my friend in jail, I listen to the words and it is him all over the place,so makes me just wish I could be more there for him, will not give up on him, he is my pal ,do not care what anyone thinks.
Enrique from Monterrey, MexicoI think this great song is dedicated to his mother. Well, I see it this way, my mother recently goes to heaven, and this song it's make me remember her for a lot of things, my father always be with her in your disease (cancer). Maybe I´m wrong but... what do you think?
Oldpink from New Castle, InThis is one of the few relatively new songs that really grab hold of me. Lewis's tortured delivery of his regretful lyrics is simply spot on. Alternately and mournful at the same time. Killer track, definitely.
P from Ville, PaTo me its about him wanting to be with someone he is not able to be with. He still is stuck on a girl that he can not have, which could be due to a number of reasons.
Mel!ssa from Pittsburgh, PaMy husband listened to this song over and over and ended up having a nervous breakdown right after sept. 11. One of those songs that spoke to his bi-polar soul and set him off.
Jared from Rehoboth Beach, DeI dont know if its right, but i think its similar to my experince. He broke up with his girl because he had alot on his mind from his father drinking and he misses his ex real bad and goes into depression and is reminisin on how him and his girl use 2 be and how she tasted wen the romance was on....thats my opinion....im tryin 2 think out the box cause i dont want to say the same thing some one already said.
Rachel from Wellington, New ZealandFor me, this song is both a love song and about drug addiction. I listened to it hundreds of times as my husband fought addiction. It felt like his way of saying he was sorry to me, he couldn't look at himself straight or love himself because he was so ashamed, but he just kept f***ing things up again. This is just what it means to me - not what it actually means.
Adam from South Pasadena, Israeldude this song is a great way to describe a lost girl
Greg House from Princeton-plainsboro, NjThis song is about a lot of things not just substance abuse. The line about bieng addicted does stand out and that could mean lots of things. Btw if you listen to the song and watch an episode of the best medical drama there is (House,MD) the lyrics take on another meaning in general. The good dr is addicted to Vicodin (my drug of choice actually) and some of the lyrics when in sync with particular scenes are powerful. Well, so much for my Vicodin, Oxycontin, Codine, and Morphine induced rant...Someone has paged me for a consult...
Max from Marquette, MiThis song is so cool , that is all that i have to say.
Rudy from Laredo, TxDamn I love this song so much....I dedicate the line ''...but I Still Remember Just The Way U Taste...'' to my baby's mother...who I still love...other than that, like Rebekah said its been awhile since lots of things....
Doug from Mount Airy, NcIt may be about a woman and drugs. I know my woman made me turn to drugs, but what was really bad is when she did too. Its been a while since either of us have had any sense of normal, and I miss the hell out of her.
Daniel from Derby, KsThe song to me sounds like it's about a person who has been in a lot of bad relationships and is having trouble dealing with it (it's been a while since i've been able to hold my head up high) now the person is in a new relationsip and is surprised at how well it's going and is reflecting on how he hasn't done anything to mess it up (...since i've gone and f'ed things up just like i always do)... but of course like others have posted, it could mean something different to everyone
Robyn from Johannesburg, South AfricaHey people!! i think that this song is so amazing and i agree with alot of people who say that it means something different to everyone. it really does because alot of people are saying that its heroine and a cocaine addiction, i think people should listen to the song for the words Lewis sings, he puts it out straight up... i dont think that he was hectic into his drugs, maybe his pot for sure but not coke and heroine! its been awhile for alotta S**t but in the end its how the song relates to you, how it makes you feel...
Chris from Danville, Vafor me this song has a very personal and deep meaning. ill take it from the top of song all the way to the end... "It's been awhile since I could hold my head up high" means hes done something for which he is ashamed (as have I) "and it's been awhile since I first saw you" mean that maybe he brought out the bad in someone for the first time and reall got a chance to see that persons anger. "and it's been awhile since I couldn't stand on my own two feet again" means that hes finally doin something for himself to better his life. "and it's been awhile since I couldn't call you" maybe he was away from the person he made angry. "And everthing I can't remember as f***ed up as it all may seem them consequences that I've rendered I've stretched myself beyond my means" means that hes done things which have rendered consequences and hes acknowledging them (even the ones he dooesnt remember)which may be his way of apologizing. "And it's been awhile since I couldn't say that I wasn't addicted and" he is recognizing that he was addicted to something or that he did something repeatedly. "It's been awhile since I could say I love myself as well as" he is realizing that he has to love and respect himself to be able to make the right choices in life. "and it's been awhile since I've gone and f***ed things just like I always do" no he is saying that hes on the right track and its been awhile since hes done the things that plagued his conscience before. "and it's been awhile but all that sh*t seems to disappear when I'm with you" either means that he met someone who encourages him to good and all the bad sh*t dissapears, or he met someone who encourages him to do bad and all the sh*t hes done to correct his mistakes dissapears. depends on my mood!!! "And everything I can't remember as f***ed up as it all may seem them consequences that I've rendered I've gone and f***ed things up again" ok its obvious that he has made another mistake... so i guess he was taking steps to correct his past and he backslid a little bit. (two steps forward one step back). "Why must I feel this way just make this go away just one more peaceful day" here he is feeling like he cant do it and he is ready to give up on his struggle to straighten up his life and he is begging for one more day without any screw-ups. one step at a time. "And it's been awhile since I could look at myself straight" he is saying that he is ashamed still for what he has done. "and it's been awhile since I said I'm sorry and it's been awhile since I've seen the way that candles light your face" means that he possibly lost someone because of what he has done and he is remembering that someone. "and it's been awhile but I can still remember just the way you taste" could possibly mean a drug or alcohol or the someone he was remembering in the last verse but to me it means alcohol. he remembers the taste of it and wants it. "and everything I can't remember as f***ed up as it all may seem to me I know it's me I can not blame this on my father he did the best he could for me" he is realizing that he cant blame anyone for the mistakes he made.. not even the one who raised him. "And it's been awhile since I could hold my head up high and it's been awhile since i said I'm sorry" this is his one last apology. i relate to this song very well and this is just one persons interpretation of the song. songs are written by an artist and contain metaphores and references to that artists life or feelings but are written to be interpreted as you see fit. if an artist really wanted to be plain and boring and just point out there feeling they would say exactly what they mean in plain simple english so everyone gets the same interpretation. so if you like just for the sound or the words... take it how you feel it thanks
Joseph Taylor from Canton , Gawho really cares exactly what the song is about the thing that gets me about this song is how the song has so much meaning to so many different types of people. weather it be about a drug addiction or about missing a loved one the song relates to so many people. truly remarkable song. i cant think of any other song that does that.
Jawsh from G-vegas, ScI heard this was about cigarettes [its been awhile since ive seen those candles light your face]
Joel from Columbia, ScIn one of their songs, Aaron mentions bieng addicted to valium so there may be a hidden message in this song
Spencer from Equinunk, PaThis song is awesome, and probably Staind's first big hit in the 8 years they'd been around.
Sarah from Niagara Falls, CanadaLewis states that the song about quote "it's been awhile since alot of things", Lewis never had a coke or heroin addiction, perhaps you people are thinking of Layne Stanley, who was a huge influence of Lewis. It's a well know fact that Lewis did smoke pot, but he has laid off that and smoking due to the birth of his 2 girls, and he doesnt drink due to childhood experinces, if your gonna post, get your facts right.
Kayla from D-ville, GaFROM: http://www.staindsouls.com
04 - "It's Been Awhile" It's just kind of an introspective song about realizing that it's been awhile since a lot of things. It's been awhile since I could hold my head up high, it's been awhile since I said I was sorry, it's been awhile since I could say that I wasn't addicted, it's been awhile since I could say I love myself. It's kind of an acknowledgement that it's been awhile.
IN OTHER WORDS THIS SONG COULD MEAN ANYTHING, AND ANYTHING TO ANYBODY IN A SITUATION. It's just been a while... for whatever.
Matthew from East Brunswick, NjBeautiful song, the song sounds so heavy, but the words are so beautiful.
Chris from Darwen, Englandthis song rocks..... ace to song to listen to while in my car
Curt from Fairfield , CtClowns, this song is about aaron's addiction to cocaine; i can still remember jus the way you taste, means he remembers the way that sweet sweet cocaine tastes. he is also thanking his new wife for everything she did for him and help him realize his life. she wouldnt have married him if he was still addicted. i jus want to kno what that part with the candles lighting his face means
Heather from Irving, Txi love this song i thing it is a very sweet romantic song it is one of my favorite love songs!
Steve from Burnsville , MnYeah, This song isn't just about drugs, and pretty much everyone in this thread is right. It's about a lot of things. It's a confession of someone who just keeps f'king things up. Yeah the drugs, the booze, and also irresponsibillity.
He knows better, but he just cant stop. He tries to straighten his life out, does for a brief time, but then goes right down the tubes again. It's about addictive personalities. My brother is like this, Yeah he was on drugs for a while, then it was alcohal, then it was just plain irresponsibillity. He had felonies before he even made it to 19. He's off the dope, but he still does stupid things.
Good example, on his 27th birthday he finally had a stable job, he was living with a girl he'd gotten pregnant, I had just given him my 98 Pontiac Sunfire only 3 years old... he had a chance... he was finally starting to turn it around again. Same night I gave him my car, he went out to the bar, got a DUI and put in Jail, lost his job because he didn't show up and the police impounded the car. Megan was on the verge of leaving him over it. I was pissed as all hell and so was my mom, because he'd been doing that kind of thing for so long.
I found him in my bedroom a couple days later with my gun in his hand and talked him out of it, But he knew he'd just lost everything again because he was stupid.
This song is about the lament of someone who just keeps doing it to themselves even though they know better. Drugs are a part of it, but if you've ever known anyone like this, even when they're not on drugs, they just keep doing it to themselves.
Lisa Smith from Pittsburgh, PaHello, this song is about his herion addiction. I have experience with this. It seems like he is talking about a lover of a female, but when you are caught up on drugs, your drug is your best friend and lover that you want to be near because it takes the pain away. To prove my point, he says "I cannot blame this on my father, he did the best he could for me" that is obvious that he's not talking about a girl, bc with addiction it is either hereditary or people blame it on their parents for how they were raised and he's saying that he doesn't blame his father. I know this song may really sound like its about a female, but take it from someone who has the same experience as him, its about herion. Also, when he says, "since I've seen the way the candle lights your face" meaning when you shoot drugs, you use fire to light the bottom of the spoon. Sorry, Guys, but I'm definately right, didn't mean to ruin the song 4 you. But take it how you want, music is meant to mean different things for different people.
Ryan from Mobile, AlHahaha! I agree with Max.
Max from New York, NyThe reason Aarron wrote the song, was that he noticed that nowadays, too many songs were about the girl saying the guys an a-hole or dick. So he decided to write a song about the guy apologizing.
Damon from Queenstown, New Zealandalatriel try and listen to the songs you like the most out of the band. after listening to the same song over and over you will start to like the bands style (you will also get sick of it). then do the same over with different songs with the same band
Alatriel from Lothlorien, Othersomebody tell me how to get into this band's music i hate them and the deftones and the smashing pumpkins and my boyfriend loves them so i need to at least make peace with them someone help
Damon from Queenstown, New ZealandTo me this song is all about a heavy drug user who is now clean, and missing his wife/partner. The first few lines say it all. "It's been awhile since I could hold my head up high." The clear meaning of that line is the drug user is ashamed of his addiction and now he can hold his head up high because he's clean. "It's been awhile since I first saw you." To me that line is dedication to the same chaps wife. He uses an exaderation to show he truly is missing his wife/partner.
Lori from Georgetown, KyI think it is that this is their third album and they have been on the road alot touring aaron has not seen his wife, done drugs and anything else for awhile.so It's been awhile!
Debbie from Winthrop, MaHello this song is about him being on drugs.Go back and read the lyrics. The line where he says "it's been awhile since i could say that i wasn't addicted" should sum it up for you.
Austin from Buies Creek, NcAaron commented on the meaning of this song, as well as all the songs off break the cycle. This song is not about and one thing, it's just the acknowledgement that it's been awhile since he's done a lot of things. Nothing more, nothing less.
Kenneth from New York, NyIf you are married, you can tell that this song is about marriage. It is deep and beautiful.
Mishel from Madera, Cai thot it was about him being on drugs and lost (its been a while sense i could say i love me myself as well as) and he just like stoped everything in his life, including seeing this gurl, so hes saying sry, and its been a while sense he could be with her, kiss her ans stuff.. love song to me
Kenneth from New York, NyI must be mental, I thought this song was about him and his wife. The "whole been awhile since i've said i'm sorry" thing.
Erk from Roswell, GaI thought it was about love...buts thats just me...
Scott from Bismarck, NdI always thought that it was about being able to see somebody after going through rehab (it's been a while since i could call you) and as far as but i can still remember just the way you taste the look at it being about drugs is interesting and possible but it could just be about finally being able to kiss the one he loved (or "other stuff")
Allison from Somewhere, NjYeah, I always thought it was about drugs (but I can still remember just the way you taste...)
Jerica from Springtown, TxI heard from somewhere that Aaron wrote this about overcoming an addiction-I think it was Valium or something. But, I don't know if that's true or not.
Rebekah from Prince George, VaTo me its about how its been awhile since alot of things...