Don't Expect Me To Be Your Friend
by Lobo

Album: Of A Simple Man (1972)
Charted: 8
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Songfacts®:

  • In this song, the singer is in love with someone he can never have. The unattainable object of his love has no idea what's going on or that there's anything wrong. >>
    Suggestion credit:
    Mike - Santa Barbara, CA
  • Maybe the object of Lobo's affection should expect him to be her friend. The singer told loBURN Magazine in 2015: "If you can't be friends with someone, then it was never good when you were doing it to begin with. That's the bottom line. If you don't still have some emotions about someone who you really did have feelings for, you're kidding yourself."
  • Born Roland Kent LaVoie, the Florida native performed in a handful of bands throughout the '60s, including The Rumours alongside Gram Parsons, before embarking on a solo career. Adopting the stage name Lobo, which is Spanish for wolf, he released his debut album, Introducing Lobo, in 1971. It featured his first hit single, "Me and You and a Dog named Boo," which peaked at #5 on the Hot 100.
  • This is the third single from Lobo's second album, Of A Simple Man. Aside from securing the #8 spot on the Hot 100, it peaked at #1 on the Easy Listening chart.
  • Jamaican reggae singer Wayne Wade covered this as "I Love You Too Much" in 1991.

Comments: 12

  • George Pope from British Columbia@Benn from Villawood

    What do you mean by bootzoning? Friendzone, I get -- BTDT!

    Love or do not love -- there are no partial measures with true & honest love.
  • George Pope from British ColumbiaQuite plainly, as I've been there; she wants to be "just friends" & he can't honestly pledge a platonic relationship with her, as he's too much in love. (IOW; he can't "dial it back" as shewants); thiscan go two ways: she rejects him outright, or she accepts him as an amorous interest instead of just a friend, & his honestyyu savesa the day & they live happily ever after. He might fake it, if he were someone else, but when it later became known, she'd reject him as a friend, too (dishonesty is a dealbreaker); to maintain a connectino to her, he honestly stayes his case. I've donme this & hads my interest returned, in time (it's a long painful wait, but worth it -- unrequited doesn't mean just "unreturned"; it means to love fully & honestly, without any requirement for it.

    This is what makes unrequited love so big in poetry and romantic literature -- it grants the beloved(the woman, in general) power & self actuality while she searches for what she believes she wants other(more) than the one presenting himself to her. Maybe she does the horrible relationship circuit with painful breaklups, & her firend comforts her, but with an unxderlying hjope that this will be the final one & she'll returm his feelings, or at least give him a fair shot at eliciting them through a relationship.

    In olden times, he would oftenm be of a lessser status/class/cvaste, & this is what is known as a "cad," if he tries to actually ask for her love. (like how DARE a commoner address me thusly?!" Commoner being however she defines his lower status relative to her self-perceived(or actual) one

    I hear this song & I become that guy again, & I feel for him -- I've learned to never accept friendship ("friendzone" in the vernacular), but to declare my intentions up front -- either I chase off one who was never going to be, or we go forward with this understanding netween us.

    I've done that so often, until I met my wife, & my interest was returned right away! (JOY! JJOY!); we've been married now for 14.5 years.

    Be true to yourself and always ever true to your beloved.

    Love will win in the end.

    TL;DR: I'm the guy in this song(metaphorically) & his words are reasonable
  • Mike Burnham from Quitman Ga.I love pretty much every thing Lobo has ever sung He is a real story teller I can relate and he makes you feel just what he is singing about. The other day l was riding along the song l love you to much to ever start liking you came on the radio sure did stir up some old feeling longtime ago!" Thanks for all you do, sing on brother, thanks for the memories
  • Rockabilly Johnny from Michigan, UsaI thought I had a similar situation, years ago, but time passed and I loved beyond her. After a different relationship ended, I realized I was over her--at that time. Years passed, I finally grew up some, and I met up with her again. We friended on Social Media. I soon realized that I was never genuinely in love with her, but only the image of the girl I wanted her to be; an image which had holes all throughout it, even all those years ago. Then came another revelation; I soon discovered that I really didn't care for her as a friend, that much. What my previous immaturity blinded me to was now very clear. I guess my point, however lengthy, is that the narrator is making an excellent call.
  • Ashish from IndiaThis song completely encapsulates the emotions, that i needed to tell the girl whom i loved dearly. It touches your heart straight and give you a trip to hell and back. That void which you feel in your life in that phase can find peace by this song. If i am gonna boot zone her, this would be the song i would be sending her and then out of her life !
  • Charlie from BostonAlmost like this song was written for me. If you're out there Karen, I hope you are fine. I could kick myself for all the time I invested. So embarrassing. I let my imagination get the better of me.
  • Keith from MiI lived this song, my lover suddenly wanted to be only friends. The story needed to end. Very painful experience. This song captures this feeling exquisitely.
  • Benn from VillawoodA beautiful, gentle ode to bootzoning. Describes exactly why we all hate being friendzoned. So long ago, yet so relevant today. I hear a song on the radio called "friends", where a man finally plucks up the courage to tell his friend how he feels about her, only for the singer to viciously rip into him because she only wants to be friends. Disgusting and immature, really. But what should I expect from my idiotic generation?

    This is the antithesis of that; a man gently telling the object of his affection that because they can only be friends, and because he cannot handle the thought of her being with another man, he wants to "just let the story kinda end", and move on with his life. The singer doesn't hate her, he doesn't use harsh tone - instead calm, but he's clearly hurt. He will get over this. He just wants to let go, cut ties and get on with his life.

    I can truly identify with this - I bootzoned a lady who friendzoned me for 3 years, but when i decided to cut contact when I was 18 (2009), she wasn't happy despite the fact that she had no romantic interest in me & had a boyfriend. & she was only the first. I got friendzoned a bunch of times since, many of which were upset about my decision to bootzone. But I never got as close to them as I did her. The lyrics describe exactly how I felt about that woman in particular - and why I got rid of her.
    Sorry for the long post, these are such direct lyrics in a sad, yet beautiful song. You don't get songs like these anymore
  • A A from CanadaNobody sings a love song (albeit unrequited) as good as Lobo. Lucky to have a chance to see him sing live in Toronto recently. His voice is as clear as ever despite his failing health. Ahhh good times doesn't last forever.
  • Matthew from Toronto, OnSuch a poignant, heart-rending song. Painful to listen to, but very reminiscent of the feelings all of us have suffered when we realize someone we love doesn't feel that way about us. And the offer to "just be friends" doesn't cut it. If we can't be lovers, then we can't be friends. Sorry. I wish it weren't like that, but there you have it. Not many songs written about unrequited love anymore; there should be more--they are extemely relevant to us all. There's a somewhat similar song from 1967 by the Cyrkle called "I Wish You Could Be Here"--painful, wistful, sad.
  • Walt from Vacaville, CaI like so many have lived this song. It is so true.
  • Glenn from Minneapolis, MnI always saw this as a song about a girl who cools on the relationship, but still wants to be friends. Because the guy is totally in love with this woman, he just can't turn off his true feelings and seeing her, especially with her new boyfriends is pure agony.

    It's not so much the woman he could never have, but the woman he once had and has now lost. In his heart he knows that his only option is to break it off completely and move on!
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