Album: Tickets to My Downfall (2020)
Play Video

Songfacts®:

  • Machine Gun Kelly's father, James Baker, passed away on July 5, 2020, a few months before the release of his Tickets to My Downfall album. They had a tumultuous relationship as his dad suffered from depression and couldn't cope with his son getting into trouble all the time. He finally kicked Kelly out of their house post-high school. They eventually patched up their differences, and this song finds MGK missing his father.

    Lonely, lonely, even when the room is full
    I'm lonely, lonely, lonely without you


    After Kelly's mom left home when he was nine, he and his father moved in with his aunt. She died of cancer in July 2017; he also speaks of missing her.

    And then she said goodbye way too soon
    And this don't feel right without you
  • Kelly wrote the song with Tickets to My Downfall producer Travis Barker. He explained to Spin that he already had a concept of a song about his aunt, who was his closest family member. When he lost his father too, Kelly called the blink-182 drummer, who allowed him to have a cathartic moment in the booth by sharing his grief.

    "That song is like the house, you know, they both were in the house, and they both are in that song," he said. "It was either take it in that song or I would have found some other way, which would have been much less friendly to myself to get my anger and pain and grief out."
  • Kelly's actress girlfriend Megan Fox encouraged the musician to ask his father questions during their last times together. This song culminates in an audio snippet of the final conversation he had with his dad when James Baker told his son about how he was born with the umbilical cord around his neck.

    "I was encouraged by someone to ask about my life, knowing that this could be the last time I was able to find out certain truths," Kelly told Kerrang. "I ultimately chose to put it on the album because it can maybe help people understand my psyche a little more, that even before I came out of the womb, I was already trying to take myself out of this world - almost feeling like I shouldn't be here or something."
  • Machine Gun Kelly performed this song on the January 30, 2021 episode of Saturday Night Live as a tribute to his late family members. After doing "My Ex's Best Friend" with a full stage production, MGK was informed he would have to perform "Lonely" stripped down because his lighting system had crashed. The rocker recalled on The Ellen Degeneres Show he had no chance to process what happened before stepping on stage. "And then they were like, '3, 2, 1, Go!,'" he said. "As soon as the chorus came, all the emotion took over and I think it worked out way better."

Comments

Be the first to comment...

Editor's Picks

Ron and Russell Mael of Sparks

Ron and Russell Mael of SparksSongwriter Interviews

The men of Sparks on their album Hippopotamus, and how Morrissey handled it when they suggested he lighten up.

Strange Magnetics

Strange MagneticsSong Writing

How Bing Crosby, Les Paul, a US Army Signal Corps Officer, and the Nazis helped shape rock and Roll.

Elton John

Elton JohnFact or Fiction

Does he have beef with Gaga? Is he Sean Lennon's godfather? See if you can tell fact from fiction in the Elton John edition.

Michael Glabicki of Rusted Root

Michael Glabicki of Rusted RootSongwriter Interviews

Michael tells the story of "Send Me On My Way," and explains why some of the words in the song don't have a literal meaning.

Bands Named After Real People (Who Aren't In The Band)

Bands Named After Real People (Who Aren't In The Band)Song Writing

How a gym teacher, a janitor, and a junkie became part of some very famous band names.

Let Me Be Your Teddy Bear: Teddy Bears and Teddy Boys in Songs

Let Me Be Your Teddy Bear: Teddy Bears and Teddy Boys in SongsSong Writing

Elvis, Little Richard and Cheryl Cole have all sung about Teddy Bears, but there is also a terrifying Teddy song from 1932 and a touching trucker Teddy tune from 1976.