Don't Touch My Junk (The TSA Hustle)

Album: not on an album (2010)
  • This is an apparently humorous song that is nothing but, in fact it has a serious genesis and an even more serious message.

    In the wake of the 9/11 atrocities, the US Government passed the Aviation and Transportation Security Act which set up the Transportation Security Administration, an organization that is ostensibly responsible for the safety of the traveling public. Unfortunately, the TSA and its employees have gone about protecting the American public, particularly at airports, in a heavy-handed and at times brutal manner, which has included intimate body searches even on very young children that some people argue with no little justification amounts to nothing less than a sexual assault.

    On November 13, 2010, John Tyner was at San Diego International Airport where he decided he didn't want to be screened partly because of the possible health hazard from the radiation. He was told he would be have to undergo a pat down, which he subjected himself to, telling the TSA screener:
    "We can do that out here, but if you touch my junk I'm gonna have you arrested".

    Fortunately, Mr Tyner recorded this encounter for posterity. In the end he decided he didn't want to fly, but the TSA told him he couldn't leave the airport unless he submitted to the screening on the way out; they also threatened to fine him $10,000. For once, Big Brother and its servants went too far, and the TSA backed down.

    This incident inspired Mike Adams - the self-styled Health Ranger - to write and record "Don't Touch My Junk"; the song took him all of 9 hours to complete, including 440 recordings of his voice. >>
    Suggestion credit:
    Alexander Baron - London, England
Please sign in or register to post comments.

Comments

Be the first to comment...

Francis Rossi of Status QuoSongwriter Interviews

Doubt led to drive for Francis, who still isn't sure why one of Status Quo's biggest hits is so beloved.

Let Me Be Your Teddy Bear: Teddy Bears and Teddy Boys in SongsSong Writing

Elvis, Little Richard and Cheryl Cole have all sung about Teddy Bears, but there is also a terrifying Teddy song from 1932 and a touching trucker Teddy tune from 1976.

Rick SpringfieldSongwriter Interviews

Rick has a surprising dark side, a strong feminine side and, in a certain TV show, a naked backside. But he still hasn't found Jessie's Girl.

Michael FrantiSongwriter Interviews

Franti tells the story behind his hit "Say Hey (I Love You)" and explains why yoga is an integral part of his lifestyle and his Soulshine tour.

Charlie DanielsSongwriter Interviews

Charlie discusses the songs that made him a Southern Rock icon, and settles the Devil vs. Johnny argument once and for all.

Black SabbathFact or Fiction

Dwarfs on stage with an oversize Stonehenge set? Dabbling in Satanism? Find out which Spinal Tap-moments were true for Black Sabbath.