The Eton Rifles

Album: Setting Sons (1979)
Charted: 3
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  • Sup up your beer and collect your fags
    There's a row going on down near Slough
    Get out your mat and pray to the west
    I'll get out mine and pray for myself
    Thought you were smart when you took them on
    But you didn't take a peep in their artillery room
    All that rugby puts hairs on your chest
    What chance have you got against a tie and a crest?

    Hello-hooray, what a nice day, for the Eton Rifles, Eton Rifles
    Hello-hooray, I hope rain stops play, with the Eton Rifles, Eton Rifles

    Thought you were clever when you lit the fuse
    Tore down the House Of Commons in your brand new shoes
    Compose a revolutionary symphony
    Then went to bed with a charming young thing

    Hello-hooray, cheers then mate, its the Eton Rifles, Eton Rifles
    Hello-hooray, an extremist scrape, with the Eton Rifles, Eton Rifles

    What a catalyst you turned out to be
    Loaded the guns then you run off home for your tea
    Left me standing, like a guilty schoolboy

    What a catalyst you turned out to be
    Loaded the guns then you run off home for your tea
    Left me standing, like a naughty schoolboy

    We come out of it naturally the worst
    Beaten and bloody and I was sick down my shirt
    We were no match for their untamed wit
    Though some of the lads said they'll be back next week

    Hello-hooray, there's a price to pay, to the Eton Rifles, Eton Rifles
    Hello-hooray, I'd prefer the plague, to the Eton Rifles, Eton Rifles

    Hello-hooray, there's a price to pay, to the Eton Rifles, Eton Rifles
    Hello-hooray, I'd prefer the plague, to the Eton Rifles, Eton Rifles

    Eton Rifles, Eton Rifles

    Eton Rifles, Eton Rifles Writer/s: Paul John Weller
    Publisher: Universal Music Publishing Group
    Lyrics licensed and provided by LyricFind

Comments: 13

  • Muz2549 from London The gift about songwriters such as weller is that when they write a song it's way ahead of it's time, just look at the words and it's no truer than what it means today. One of my tattoos has the mod sign with the words sup up your beer and collect your fans, as the song has real meaning to it that I 100% believe
  • Vincent from LondonThe comments about the SWP march are absolutely correct, and Weller has confirmed this, though there is a conflation of several similar incidents. Class war and the SWP organised several of these marches at about the same time on many of the major Public Schools, some of these were extremely violent. I was a junior at one of these school at the time, a girl from a nearby all girls public school had her face razored, In the particular incident of which I am aware it was a water polo team and the CCF ( Combined Cadet Force) who were involved not a Rugby team, but water polo does not scan as well as "rugby". There was a massive police presence and Day Boys were sent home early and the boarders confined to house. A near by Catholic school was released early on the same day ( lack of grown up communication) and it kicked off any way. The drive behind the whole incident was sectarian as well as class driven though at the time, ( the troubles were still on) the two issues overlapped in London quite a lot. I have no idea how much of this Weller was aware of. The public School I was at also loved this song. I think Weller's true genius is that like the Kinks and Madness he manages to tell stories that are snapshots of English life at the time. Public School boys do not choose to go to those schools any more than any other child does. which is why I think those songs were so popular in side and out side the public school system, it is a tribute to Weller's lyrics and a slice of a very different England to the one in which we live today
  • Kwami from Washington Dc, DcPolitical context aside, this is a great song. As in "Anarchy in the UK," the references are lost on this Yank. I couldn't care less frankly, and it was over three decades ago in any case. The tunes both stand up, which is all that matters.
  • Sally from London, United KingdomI read on another site that it was about "the public school boys that run the government." I'm not sure of the real meaning, but I do really like the idea that it's a song about working class schoolboys' frustration at these public school boys; "what a nice day for the Eton Rifles" - if taken from the perspective of these working class boys, how annoying it is to be constantly bested - in the song, these kids are beaten by the Eton Rifles, and the importance is placed upon the fact that they are from Eton, not just an equal footed loss - like, as mentioned, "what chance do you have against a tie and a crest?" They're constantly battling to prove that they can better, can fight harder, but they're always, in the end, going to be blamed or put-down - oppressed by the public school boys who 'run the government'. I know it's probably about politics, but when I listen to it, I always hear frustration and agitation and that kind of anger and acknowledged damnation - think the first person perspective in 'Common People' by Pulp or the second person in 'A Certain Romance' by Arctic Monkeys.
  • Erik from Leiderdorp, NetherlandsI don't get the deeper meaning of this. Maybe it's a cultural difference. The "facts" as I have read them seem to be that left wing protesters pick a fight with people they perceive to be right wing, upper class and therefore "Posh" and therefore they hate them. They are mistaken in the brute force the upper class boys are able to field. Left wing protesters take a beating. Some of the left-wing protesters run away, leaving some others to get hurt even more badly. So, what's the social/political comment here? Upper class should not defend themselves when they're attacked? Most very left-wingers are cowards and leave other people to take a beating in a fight they started when push comes to shove? Upper class should steer clear of left-wing protests in order not to get provoked and be forced deliver a thrashing on the protesters? Hope someone can put this into perspective for me!
  • P from Plsmith69@hotmail.com, United KingdomOr alternatively, what actually happened during the 'Right To Work' march in the 80's could be studied.

    A (very) left-wing political group ironically calling themselves the "Socialist WORKERS Party," (SWP,) took part in the demonstration. Seeing a group of Eton boys and possibly viewing them as posh and therefore soft, a number of the SWP decided to pick a fight with them, dragging other people on the demo with them. Unfortunately they'd overlooked the fact that one of the major school sports is Rugby which tends to make those that play it both tough and strong.
    The SWP group rapidly realised they'd chosen the wrong people to bully so they ran away, leaving other demonstrators who had joined in the scrap to get battered.
    The song can be seen as coming from one of the non-SWP demonstrators who got left in the fight while the SWP bravely ran away.

    Take a look:
    "Thought you were smart when you took them on,
    But you didnt take a peep in their artillary room,
    All that rugby puts hairs on your chest,
    What chance have you got against a tie and a crest.

    What a catalyst you turned out to be,
    Loaded the guns then you run off home for your tea,
    Left me standing - like a guilty schoolboy.

    We came out of it naturally the worst,
    Beaten and bloody and I was sick down my shirt,"


    But at the time I thought I was into left wing politics, (though now cowardly idiots like the SWP,) so it can't be true...
  • P from Plsmith69@hotmail.com, United Kingdom"The Eton Rifles are a team. It's about sports violence."
    - Nessie, Sapporo, Japan

    First we've heard about it. Nessie, when you wrote this had you just finished a case of Sapporo ?
  • Chris from Leeds, United KingdomThe Leeds incident was at the Queens Hotel with the Australian Rugby League team who were on tour in the UK. There is no such rugby team as the "Eton Rifles" - although there is a soccer team called Eton Rifles, inspired by the song.

    Otherwise - see Paul from London's comment as he's 100% correct.
  • Paul from London, EnglandThere's a class war element alright, but this is nothing to do with the rugby player incident (which was in Leeds, not Eton) and is not a reference to a sports team.

    It's a reference to a true historical clash in the UK, between protesters on a nationwide "right-to-work" march (I think it was organized by the Trades Union Congress, or TUC - there were a series of these marches in the late 70s and early 80s while Thatcherism took hold) and hostile pupils from Eton public school, who started jeering the marchers.

    The line "all that rugby puts hair on your chest" is not a reference to the Leeds incident, but is a reflection of the common (and somtimes superficial) distinction in the UK that public schools promote rugby as a winter sport whilst state schools play soccer. By referencing rugby the emphasis on the class status of public school pupils, compared to the status of the (working class) protesters, is reinforced. Lines such as "there's a row going on down near Slough" (Slough is a few miles from Eton) and "what chance have you got against a tie and a crest" (both tie and crest again alluding to the public school uniform) reinforce the picture.

    By this stage in their careers the Jam were well into left wing politics; this track is one of their finest showcases on that front and appears on the Setting Sons album, which is probably the group's most political work.
  • Michael from TaurangaIt got to #3 in 1979. It was their first Top 10 single.
  • Jack from Belfast, IrelandPaul and Bruce were in a pub and Psul ended up getting in a fight with some rugby players, Bruce's ribs were bruised and it mucked up the rest of the tour. I think it has something to do with that.
  • Grahame from York, Englandthe song is actually about class wars in england, and also refers to when paul was beaten up by some eton rugby players and he got prosecuted and not them etc
  • Nessie from Sapporo, JapanThe Eton Rifles are a team. It's about sports violence.
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