21 Things I Want In A Lover

Album: Under Rug Swept (2002)
  • songfacts ®
  • Artistfacts ®
  • Lyrics
  • In the opening track from her fifth studio album, Morissette poses 21 questions to potential suitors, from their thoughts on capital punishment to their proclivities in the bedroom. These things are "not necessarily needs but qualities that I prefer," she sings.

    "There's a part of this song where I'm joking, but there's a whole part of this song where I'm dead serious," she explained in the album's track-by-track commentary. "The more aware of the qualities I am looking for, the more I'm able to recognize them when they appear, as opposed to having the initial meeting romantically be singularly dependent on chemical reaction or some intangible, indefinable, heart-palpitating, palm-sweating thing. Because the palm sweating, heart palpitating beginnings of a relationship often result in a huge amount of incompatibility, so the concept of compatibility is so much more important to me as I get older."
  • Morissette told Spin magazine her list goes far beyond 21. "I have, like, 673 things," she laughed. "I wrote a new list the other day. It has to be updated after every guy. I want someone who can be a complete dork with me and have no shame and be really disgusting. Because life is just so f--king short. Without a map, I wander aimlessly. And infatuation just blurs the whole thing for me. So I can go, 'Oh, spirituality is very important to me, and this person, no matter how much I want to f--k him right now, does not believe in God.' That list has saved my ass on a few occasions."
  • This features Dean DeLeo of Stone Temple Pilots on guitar.
  • This was used on the TV series Roswell in the 2002 episode "Crash."
Please sign in or register to post comments.

Comments

Be the first to comment...

Women Who RockSong Writing

Evelyn McDonnell, editor of the book Women Who Rock, on why the Supremes are just as important as Bob Dylan.

Country Song TitlesFact or Fiction

Country songs with titles so bizarre they can't possibly be real... or can they?

Director Paul Rachman on "Hunger Strike," "Man in the Box," KissSong Writing

After cutting his teeth on hardcore punk videos, Paul defined the grunge look with his work on "Hunger Strike" and "Man in the Box."

Have Mercy! It's Wolfman JackSong Writing

The story of the legendary lupine DJ through the songs he inspired.

Oliver LeiberSongwriter Interviews

Long before she was judging contestants on American Idol, Oliver was producing Paula Abdul. Here's how he helped turn this unknown choreographer into a star.

Francesca BattistelliSongwriter Interviews

The 2011 Artist of the Year at the Dove Awards isn't your typical gospel diva, and she thinks that's a good thing.