Songfacts®:

• I catch myself in a mirror
  See a pathetic little boy
  Who's come to get you down
  
  Fender has accumulated self-loathing, jealousy and fear of abandonment, all carried over from his childhood. He projects the negativity onto others, making them feel down as well. Fender told NME how his "insecurity tore apart my relationships, and my last relationship in particular."
• I try again
  I study the pattern
  I see the triggers
  But I can't shake 'em loose
  
  Fender could see that the way he was acting was ruining his relationships. He knew why but couldn't stop it. He told Apple Music: "I was coming back home after being started on by a bunch of lads but not doing anything about it because I was on my own. So I'd punch walls and stuff. I used to do that all the time in my early twenties. It's toxic behavior. You can't do that."
• Fender came up with the track back in 2019, but his record label was unsure at first, as they thought he was trying too hard to write a single. It was one of the Geordie singer-songwriter's favorites, so he still recorded it for Seventeen Going Under. Once he'd laid down the album, Polydor Records A&R man Richard O'Donovan admitted to him: "I was completely wrong. That song is absolutely incredible."
• Seventeen Going Under has an ongoing theme of growing up and the self-esteem issues that people carry into their adult life. This song finds Fender turning the mirror on himself as he reflects on how insecurities and feelings of low self-worth destroyed his relationships.
• Thom Lewis, rather than Fender's usual producer, Bramwell Bronte, helmed the track. Lewis also produced four out of five of the bonus tracks on the deluxe version of Seventeen Going Under.
• The musicians are:
  
  Guitar: Dean Thompson
  Drums: Drew Michael
  Synth Bass: Thom Lewis
  Synthesizer: Joe Atkinson
  Saxophone: Johnny "Blue Hat" Davis
  Strings: Wired Strings (arranged by Rosie Danvers)
• Hector Dockrill (Stormzy, Jorja Smith, Ray Blk) directed the video, which sees Fender driving a car around a racetrack before being involved in a bloody accident.