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Album: Past Lives (2018)
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Songfacts®:

  • Against the Current frontwoman Chrissie Costanza wrote this song about a friend of hers, Julius Trombino, who fatally overdosed in September 2016. She explained to Kerrang:

    "I needed to write it because I've been trying to work through these emotions. I couldn't figure out how one person could feel all of those things at the same time and it never makes sense. We wanted to show how life can be so contradictory, and it can be so much contrast in the way you can feel simultaneously."
  • This song was co-penned by Sarah Hudson, who has collaborated with Katy Perry on several of her hit tunes including her #1 single "Dark Horse." Costanza recalled to Kerrang:

    "I tried to write that song probably 20 or 30 times over in my room. I just could not get it right, and it was a one song that I refused to put on the album if it wasn't right. I'd been going through those feelings for year and a half at that point, and it wasn't getting any better."

    Costanza's breakthrough came when she turned up for a writing appointment with Sarah Hudson, who asked her how she was feeling. The Against the Current singer replied: "Honestly I'm feeling frustrated, because I have this one lyric and I have these emotions I want to write about, but no matter what I say they don't come out the right way."

    Costanza started talking about her feelings concerning her loss and Hudson responded, "Well there's your lyric! Turn what you just told me into it." The singer concluded that Hudson, "made it so simple."

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