Chaotic

Album: I Used To Think I Could Fly (2022)
Charted: 36 80
Play Video

Songfacts®:

  • This piano ballad finds Tate McRae wanting to make some changes to her life as she reaches her late teenage years. She'd like to cut her friends off as they've got nothing in common, she but fears being lonely. McRae is also missing her ex, and the heartbreak she feels after her split makes her cautious about another relationship. However, the Canadian singer acknowledges she will love again and is blowing things out of proportion.

    During the pre-chorus and chorus we learn McRae is talking to somebody who'd noticed she's going through a confusing time. She vents her frustrations, telling the person that growing up is chaotic and she didn't realize "changing would be this exhausting."
  • McRae wrote the song with:

    Her regular songwriting partner Victoria Zaro ("You Broke Me First," "Feel Like S--t").

    The song's producer Greg Kurstin. The American hitmaker also produced her previous single, "She's All I Wanna Be."
  • McRae released "Chaotic" on March 25, 2022 as the third single off of her debut album, following "Feel Like S--t" and "She's All I Wanna Be." She said "Chaotic" was "literally such a hard song write" and that it's probably the saddest song on the album.
  • McCrae first teased "Chaotic" in February 2022 when she shared a snippet of the song on her TikTok. It sparked a trend where users posted videos of themselves crying in private while maintaining an outwardly happy face publicly, to correspond with the lyrics, "You said it looks like I've been going through hell. How did you know, how could you tell?"
  • McRae penned "Chaotic" at Greg Kurstin's studio. She'd been writing with plenty of people but wasn't getting any songs she connected with. McRae attributes this to all the changes going on in her life, having recently graduated high school and moved to LA from Calgary. The teenage singer had yet to settle into her own skin and work out who she was.

    McRae wrote the song quietly on her computer. She told Apple Music: "I feel like this was one of the first times that I sat down in a session and I was like, 'Okay, I need to really talk about where my mental state is at right now, because I don't know if it's looking too good.'"

    An hour later, McRae had finished the tune. She walked across the studio, gave Kurstin a high five, and left.

Comments

Be the first to comment...

Editor's Picks

Does Jimmy Page Worship The Devil? A Look at Satanism in Rock

Does Jimmy Page Worship The Devil? A Look at Satanism in RockSong Writing

We ring the Hell's Bells to see what songs and rockers are sincere in their Satanism, and how much of it is an act.

Vanessa Carlton

Vanessa CarltonSongwriter Interviews

The "A Thousand Miles" singer on what she thinks of her song being used in White Chicks and how she captured a song from a dream.

Justin Timberlake

Justin TimberlakeFact or Fiction

Was Justin the first to be Punk'd by Ashton Kutcher? Did Britney really blame him for her meltdown? Did his bandmates think he was gay?

Billy Gould of Faith No More

Billy Gould of Faith No MoreSongwriter Interviews

Faith No More's bassist, Billy Gould, chats to us about his two new experimental projects, The Talking Book and House of Hayduk, and also shares some stories from the FNM days.

What Musicians Are Related to Other Musicians?

What Musicians Are Related to Other Musicians?Song Writing

A big list of musical marriages and family relations ranging from the simple to the truly dysfunctional.

Dino Cazares of Fear Factory

Dino Cazares of Fear FactorySongwriter Interviews

The guitarist/songwriter explains how he came up with his signature sound, and deconstructs some classic Fear Factory songs.